Reflecting on Anxiety and phone usage
As human beings, we are animals, yet we are slowly being made into robots. At one time, we could notice what our bodies needed by trusting our instincts. The feelings we noticed would give us signals that we need the toilet, we are hungry, full or tired. We could then make sure we acted accordingly. Nowadays we have so many apps for all these things that if we are not on our phones, we may become anxious because we feel we need to be doing something and so we turn to our phones for answers.
Being neurodivergent, like myself, can also make this tricky because a lot of these apps are helpful for us. They help us to prioritise things and remember tasks. Whilst I think these are helpful in some ways, I feel they could cause an even bigger issue in the long run because we are needing to rely on our phones more and more.
We need to get back to noticing the signals in our body if we can. This is important because the only person who truly knows us, is ourselves. Anxiety is becoming huge in society. Most bodies instinctively know what to do; except for when we have a faulty alarm system as this interferes with rational decision making. I am starting to realise that our phones can be a huge part of that.
Of course, people aren't making social media content and apps to cause us problems knowingly. It is the people higher up that are pulling all the strings. They seem very aware of what they are doing. We are being made the puppets, happily going along with it all. When people are using social media as a tool for their mental health, we are made to think that we just need to find the solution to fix everything. This is why we need to find our own beacons inside of us as we will know when we need rest, food, fun, connection and stimulation.
We all have different sized batteries, so life is not the same for everyone. My batteries are 2 double AA ones. They run down quickly when being used all the time. Other people may have a car battery. If I start to search for advice about something on the internet, I am likely to find completely different advice all within the space of a couple of minutes, advice from people with big batteries, to even smaller ones than mine. Some people might be using the wrong sized batteries completely, and some peoples batteries might even be flat! Our own beacon will tell us what we need to do, whether we need to change the batteries, or charge them up.
So how does this really link to anxiety?
If we continue to let ourselves be ruled by social media or society, anxiety will keep us stuck because of the way our brains are wired towards the faulty alarm systems. It will keep us operating from a state of fear with a belief that we need to keep searching for the right answer (and we might not even know what the question is!)
Social media will constantly suggest different solutions/advice, all within a few seconds and it leaves the brain frazzled and overwhelmed. This is no place to start to try and engage with our inner compass. Instead it's going to highlight the stress we feel, which makes the need to search for answers more urgent and we become stuck in a loop.
It all starts with recognising what is happening, and feeling the discomfort in our bodies if we can. The more we start to move away from the need to check our phones, the more we will start to notice when our body feels calm. We can learn to respond to the feelings within our bodies and start to find the answers within ourselves.
Self care
Another thing we can easily get sucked into on social media, is self care. Self care isn't all about buying things to help us feel more relaxed. It isn't about needing to have the special journal, or a candle to burn. It is about recognising what you need. What does relaxation look like for you? What is the best exercise for you; Something slow and steady, or fast and vigorous? Do you need to get a drink, or something to eat? Or go for a walk/get some fresh air?
Leisure
Breaking up self care into 2 parts can mean that you can also add into your day or week, something that you enjoy doing that is fun. What might that look like to you? Fun for me is creating something either out of colours or words. Or spending time with a friend.
By adding self-care and leisure time into your week, you are helping to recharge your battery.
Remember
A faulty alarm system is when we start feeling on edge, nervous, anxious, yet there is no reason to feel like this in reality. The alarm has gone off unnecessarily. What we need to do, is start to recognise that this is a false alarm and we don't need to give it our attention. The more we learn to let the alarm sound without rushing to try and fix it, the quicker the alarm battery will run out and we can then work on tuning into ourselves. Listening to our bodies whilst the alarm is sounding off is not the right time to listen to our signals as our thoughts are not coming from a place of reason.
www.donnachestercounselling.co.uk
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